Gratitude and Thanks

This is the time of year where its proper and stylish to be grateful at one moment or another for all of the good things in our life. We see it all over the media how individuals with their own stories to tell have added their take on the importance of gratitude, and the affect that it has on their lives. I especially love the news features where the focus of the story overcomes an illness against all odds, or others where people take it upon themselves to take the idea of charity in their lives to an entirely new level. It’s a great change of pace from what is the norm of negative news reporting.

To that I say, wonderful. But, what about the rest of the year? Can any other part of the calendar year have a vested interest in the concept of gratitude? Why are we just saving it for that special period between the end of November and the beginning of January?

I think your life takes on immediate improvement the moment you show gratitude, or think gratitude, all the time. Not just one month a year.

If you are healthy, you should show gratitude.

If you have family that loves you, you should be grateful.

Right now, if you have a job or own a business that supplies you with money because you work hard at it, you should, without question, be grateful.

And this is the right way to think throughout the entire year. Not just now. How about trying to think that way for the rest of your entire life? With very few exceptions, we all have many things to be grateful for within the span of our time here on earth. And those events/times from the past that I thought were just pretty good? They were very special…and I have gratitude that I was able to live them.

The things that were not so good? Eventually, they just become shadows. I give thanks for that also.

Yesterday, for the Thanksgiving holiday, I had a great time with my family. We talked, laughed, had too much fun, and ate like kings and queens. Before we ate , we gave thanks for everything in our lives that we have appreciation for. As we prayed, I once again considered how lucky I am to have everything that I do.

I realize that once a year gratitude is not enough. Can never be enough. To live the life that you want, you have to be consistent and count the many blessings, on a daily basis. Especially those times when you’re feeling a little grumpy, and being grateful is the last thing you want to be.

That’s the essence of life. The people, places and things that make you happy, and having awareness of them, all the time. Happy Thanksgiving!

How To Have The Focus Of A Closer

Your ability to focus may be the one primary factor in your ability to reach a goal, complete a project, or just flat out succeed. An athlete like Mariano Rivera is an example of the possibilities of one’s talent to focus to bring a dream or dreams to fruition. Without an intense ability to focus, Rivera most likely would not have become one of baseball’s most dominant pitchers of this decade, and a marvel of post-season success that has enabled the New York Yankees to win multiple championships.

The more I read about Rivera—and research what he does and how he does it—I don’t think that the majority of us could display the tenacity, mental toughness, and physical endurance that someone like Rivera does to reach the pinnacle of his sport. While growing up in Panama, Rivera substituted a stick for a baseball bat, and played with ragged, damaged baseballs. Then, as he got older, his father put him to work in a very physical job in his fishing business for 12 hours a day. Yup, this type of upbringing and driven focus makes Rivera a member of the old school, so my apologies to the young and ambitious of the new school.

It’s not your fault, though. And there’s really not much you can do about it.

There are far too many distractions in this world now to achieve that extreme sense of focus. When Rivera was a younger man in his native Panama, I’m sure was not much time spent on cable television, internet, cell phones, or texting. These modern “conveniences” of today are not conducive at all to the job of focus. The distractions that Rivera deals with—the rigors of travel, injuries, the constant lure of partying in New York City nightclubs—are minimal in number for him, and prove to be no match for his single minded intensity. He wants to win, more than he wants almost anything else.

Focus for me? I’d like to think I could pay attention to the road when I’m driving, instead of looking to the side to see the turn of the autumn leaves, or that drawn out construction project on the main highway. I marvel at the fact some people can drive, talk, text, and eat a doughnut while applying makeup at the same time. I can be as distracted as anyone, and returning to any task after distraction is difficult, and time consuming. It is starting all over again.

There’s still hope, however. You or I may not be able to attain the focus of a champion pitcher, business tycoon, or an actor in their zone. But there are some things we can do to improve our lot in life, whether the goals are large or small:

Write It Down! A training regimen of a Rivera, or an action plan for your business, does you no good unless it’s on paper. The most successful people in any line of work can tell you that a large goal (winning a World Series game) is accomplished by taking steps and completing subgoals (running, exercising, throwing every day). Don’t leave those steps to your memory…write them down to get them done.

Visualize It! Once Rivera knew the impact his pitching prowess could have, he no doubt saw himself as a champion one day. The rest was just completing the steps to get him there. For those of us that aren’t pitchers, whether the goal is a six figure income, the trip of a lifetime, or an improvement on your home, you have to see it in your mind before it can become reality.

Avoid Excessive Media I think this is a big one. How could I write this post, or concentrate on anything, if the TV’s on, I’m net surfing, or someone’s showing me the latest app on their new phone? Every commercial and show that you watch is so quickly edited, I can barely stand it. No wonder kids exposed to too much TV can’t pay attention. I’m so happy I grew up in an era where the camera was focused for longer than one second!

Hold Yourself Accountable! And if that’s not enough, make others hold you accountable, too! Enlist a couple of friends if you have too. Rivera goes through the same stretching and warm up routine constantly—even when he’s not scheduled to pitch! He holds himself to a training standard that most athletes wouldn’t even touch, giving him a great advantage when he needs it most. You can also hold yourself to a higher standard in anything you do. I’d like to think that each blog post I publish will be to the best of my ability. And hopefully you, the reader, will hold me accountable!

Take Persistent Action! Here’s where Rivera really seperates himself from his peers. No other pitcher of this era has his tunnel vision, his unsurpassed will to win. Even with the bases loaded and a full count standing up against him, he keeps his cool, keeps throwing his best pitches, never waning in the attempt to impose his will on the batter in front of him. Rivera avoided sure defeat in a couple of matches by continually pressing the action, always in constant motion, wearing his opponent down to record that final out.

You, or me, may never be able to focus like Mariano Rivera. But we can always take action, be a little more relentless, and make things happen.

Reflections On Coffee

Several nights a week, I go to my parents’ house to have coffee with my dad and my grandmother, who will turn 96 years young next month. At that advanced age, she is definitely not who she used to be. She can carry on a conversation with me only once in a great while, and at times it’s difficult to understand what she is saying. But that’s OK with me. We can still talk about the old days occasionally, and I can vividly remember a lot of things, the way they used to be. To me, it’s reflection. About how great that part of life was and how it can influence what’s to come.

My grandmother operated a restaurant for a good part of her life. Even when she wasn’t working, the preparation of food for her family was a central part of her day. Therefore, she lived in her kitchen. And when I went to her house (which was often), that’s where I hung out. Not in the TV room, or living room. In the kitchen. At the kitchen table. To get my daily dose of “Life is precious” (her favorite saying), and to hear about which saint to pray to when you needed something found, or something done.

And to get the coffee.

There was always a pot of coffee brewing on the stove. No drip pot here, mind you. Always perking in a stainless steel espresso pot, ready to pour when it began to bubble over through the top of the pot. Even on ninety plus degree summer days when I had just finished the three hour task of mowing the vast lawn around my grandparents’ house, there was no offer of a glass of water….

Just a shout across the yard of “Joey, you want some coffee??”

If the stove did not have coffee brewing coffee pot on it, there was always a pot of simmering tomato sauce, or boiling spinach, or meatballs in a pan sizzling away in their bed of olive oil—and with it an indescribable scent of a garlic/meat combo wafting through the entire house. I often woke up on a Saturday morning to that aroma, and I can still smell it right now.

Reflection is power, the power of memory. I get a charge out of reflecting on what was in the past, and how it can spur me on to create new memories, with my friends and my family. And what’s more cool than remembering in such detail that you smell the smells and hear the sounds?